[Question:]{.underline} Does apostasy of one’s spouse from the Catholic Faith give one the right to refuse the marriage debt and to separate?
[Answer:]{.underline} It is truly a very sorrowful time when a husband or wife either abandons all Christian Faith (=apostasy) or abandons the Catholic Church and joins a heretical sect (=heresy). This poses immense problems for the Catholic spouse, for when a person abandons the Faith that he has once held, he generally becomes very bitter and antagonistic towards it. Perseverance in cohabitation with such a spouse can be a great danger to the Faith of the Catholic spouse, constantly exposed to opposition and perversion. It can also be a grave danger to the faith of the children, whom the apostate will frequently turn away from the Catholic Church.
It is for these reasons that the Church has considered, since the time of Pope Urban III in the 12^th^ century, that spiritual adultery can constitute a sufficient reason for separation. It is by analogy with physical adultery, that Our Lord Himself considered sufficient reason for separation (Mt. 19:9). Adultery is called spiritual when a person abandons the one true spouse of Our Lord Jesus Christ, the Roman Catholic Church, and adheres to a false religion, sect, or atheistic belief. It is called adultery because it is a betrayal of the whole mystical symbolism of marriage: the union between Christ and the Catholic Church consummated on the Cross. However, marriage vows are not thereby dissolved, and if the apostate later returns to the practice of the Catholic Faith, then the Catholic party is be obliged to resume the common life with him (or her) and render the marriage debt.
This is summarized in Canon 1131 of the 1917 Code of Canon Law. In fact, it is the first of several reasons given that could justify a Catholic for separating from his spouse, the others being the insistence on giving a non-Catholic education to the children, or living a criminal and shameful life, or threat of grave danger to body or soul, or abuse that makes the common life unbearable. The Canon, however, reminds Catholics that such a separation can only be undertaken with the authorization of the Ordinary of the place, and not on one’s own authority, unless perhaps the facts are certain and there is a danger in delay. It is interesting to note that eight centuries of ecclesiastical Tradition and common sense have been done away with in the 1983 Code (Canon 1153), which carefully excludes abandonment of the Faith or adhesion to a sect from the reasons that justify separation. It is difficult not to see here a clear sign of the indifferentism to the true Faith that characterizes the modern church.
This being said, it does not follow from the above that in the case of one’s spouse abandoning the Faith one must separate. Far from it. In general, this will neither be necessary nor prudent. Frequently, the rebellion against the Faith and the Church will be a temporary temptation or spiritual difficulty, and patience on the part of the Catholic party is the best way to handle the passing problem. Not infrequently, the rejection of God and Faith will also be a personal thing and will not affect directly the religious life of the Catholic party or the children. In such cases, it is imperative that separation not take place, on account of the grievous psychological harm that such a separation is wont to engender in the children, and the bitterness in the spouses. In short, every effort must be made to keep the cohabitation for as long as there is no danger of perversion of the Faith or moral life of either the Catholic spouse or the children. Likewise, no effort must be spared to obtain the counseling necessary to bring about an understanding, even on a purely natural level, so as to keep the married life together. By courageously bearing these crosses the Catholic spouse will most effectively sanctify the person whom on earth he is most bound to love, as St. Paul teaches: “And if any woman hath a husband that believeth not, and he consent to dwell with her, let her not put away her husband. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the believing wife; and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the believing husband” (I Cor 7:13,14).
Answered by Father Peter Scott, SSPX.